Success...mostly (now a lot of success!!!)

[ladybug1802]

A lot of you will know the issues I have had with Dylan with strange people....lungeing,snapping, no warning etc and generally being rather unpredictable. But the last few weeks, when he is with me at least, I have really noticed an improvement! The last 2 weekends I have taken him to little local horse shows to watvh friends, and he has been amazing. Last weekend he met 2 friends he has never met before, and one friends mum, and he went over to them, they gave him some sausage, and they were able toi stroke him and he didnt look worried at all! I was watching his face the entire time as I can see when he is feeling concerned and is likely yo react, but I havent seen that face in months!

Yesterday I went to another show and he was great with the 2 friends from last week, plus a lady he had never met before....all great. And we were standing watching a friend do a dressage test, and friend's dad came and stood right next to m to chat. I had already told him to just ignore Dylan (as we are not neant to be actively seeking out these situations at the moment!) but whereas last year Dylan would have then stared at the man and possibly lunged, he justsat there nicely taking sausage pieces form me and looking around calmly!

I was so proud of him!! He has also been getting a lot better at the vets...the vet or nurses can now sit 2 chairs away from him now and he just glances occasionally at them while eting treats....whereas before he would have stared and fixated as soon as they czme into the waiting room. And we have been doing a lot of counter conditioning at a National Trust outdoor cafe at th weekend....this Sat he didnt bat an eyelid with some kids running round¬ All great!

He has also been really good when he is on lead and if off lead dogs come over to him.

But he goes to my dog walker friend 3 or 4 days a week when I am at work, she keeps him on his long lead and harness just in case, and had a text from hr this morning to say they has come across a walker and her dog, and Dylan had ignored the lady which was great...but she said the lady's dog (a female cocker) had come to sniff, they had sniffed each other then he apparantly put his mouth over her back as if to bite (but not breaking the skin) and got all growly. Now he is only ever like this occasionally if he meets a male entire dog, and this was a female. He has not done this with me in ages....admittedly if off lead dogs come over I try to body block them, but if I cant (like last weekend when a group of about 8 people and 3 dogs came along, and the people just let their dogs come over to me, despoite having Dylan on lead and off the path!) he has been a lot better recently. Could ti have something to do with the fact he has other dogs around him, off lead?

I wish I could not have to take Dylan to her...I love her to bits and she is great, but I feel I lose control rather a lot. I do such a lot of work with him when I walk him and have him, go out of my way to do things correctly, and hate the thought of the effort being wasted when yhe is with her. She is great with dogs and does love him, but I just wish i didnt have to work so I could have total control. Its hard when I am not there to see it, as what she describes and what happened and why may be totally different things because I know his reactions...and altho I dont always know why he does certain things, if I can see them I can have more of an idea. Thats not making sense is it!

Just I have gon from feeling so pleased and proud, to feeling a litle sad...I dont like to feel I am letting him down when he isnt with me as he has made so much progress

[JudyN]

You should be proud of what you've achieved! You can only do what you do, and I'm sure the improvement you've seen will carry over into other situations. Also, if he didn't properly bite the other dog, but just 'had words' with her, that's not so bad Other dogs were quite vociferous with Jasper when he hadn't yet learned proper manners, and now he sometimes does the same if a younger dog bounces up rudely to him. It's not something I encourage, obviously, but it's not really a problem.

Maybe the female cocker was a bit butch....

[ladybug1802]

Yes you are right Judy...thank you! I think if it was me who was with Dylan and had seen what had happened it wouldnt have been a big deal.....but my friend, as good as she is with dogs, doesnt 'read' them brilliantly because she has never really had a dog with issues! So when she first witnessed Dylan issues with stramgers (when he ran out of the woods, past a walker and as he ran past snapped at the guy and ran off) she said there was no fear involved at all. I disagreed....and I mentioned it to J*n B*wen when I went to see him the first time, and he said of course it was out of fear and insecurity....and as the man was walking away it gave Dylan confidence to try and send him away even further!

She found it hard to se it was through fear.....so although I tell her these things, and she sees the improvements and is reallyu pleased, she would see this today and see it as purely 'aggression'....so i got a text from her telling me about it, and when I asked more about it she said it was 'unprovoked and aggressive' which for some reasons saddened me even more. I know how he gets with some entire male dogs....growly and yes, can look I suppose like he may 'bite' but he never does, and it only lasts a few seconds or so, then he stops. But this was a female dog, but he was on lead....and altho he has been better on lead with ME, maybe with her and the other dogs running round he doesnt feel the same way.

I wish I could give up work and just walk and work with my dog instead of having to give him to someone else

[WufWuf]

It might not feel like you're making the progress you wish you were but if you think of where you came from then you see how far you've come.

To be fair to Dylan you don't know if this female cocker was really rude or bossy to him and if you're friend's not super hot on reading dogs she would think nothing happened but dogs can be rude in ways that are so subtle to us. The old head over shoulder move is one that I see being missed over and over again with other dog owners.

Honey can spot a insecure social climber dog just by the way they walk and they make her very nervous. There's a woman with just such a dog that I see on occasion and her dog has to tell everyone that she's better then them. The woman is totally unaware of what her dog is saying and insists on heading straight for me (with her dog off lead) everytime she sees me, she will actually follow me as I try to get away. I am certain that a fight would break out if her dog greeted Honey in the way she greets the other dogs. Head up, tail up fast wagging, high stepping progressing to head over shoulder and silent threats if they try to move before she's done with them. I can tell this woman has no idea what her dog is saying and she thinks she's just a sweetie .

So don't get too disheartened, I know how hard it can be, sometimes it feels like one step forward two steps back.

I'm lucky that I get to be with Honey most of the time but my OH takes her out on Sunday mornings and although he loves her dearly he's not 100% (yet) on what she's saying or why she's saying it and I do worry that all my hard work goes out the window because he thinks it's no big deal if she reacts to X,Y or Z. He's getting better with her though and will now give the lead to me if we're out together and we come across a dog as she trusts me better and is therefore slower to react as she know I'll do my best to get her out of the scary situation. When we first got her he'd take the lead off me as he thought she'd "respect" him more and therefore not "misbehave" and I was fool enough to believe him . It took me a hell of a lot of work and research to get where I am now and he's starting to see the fruits of my labour so is coming around to my way of doing things.

Just a suggestion but can you arrange to walk Dylan with your friend once a week or so as this way you can help her understand what he's thinking/doing in more situations?

[minkee]

You are doing great, ladybug, and I'm sure this isn't setting him back. It just highlights how relaxed and confident he is around you. When you're not there, he feels like he still has to look after himself a bit, but when you're there he has total trust that nothing is going to go wrong. Which is really great!! Every little incident he has on the walk is obviously amplified because you're considering all the 'what if's, but you KNOW that he's coming on in leaps and bounds, and while you can't be with him every step of the way, your friend IS vigilant, and while not perfect, no terrible set backs are going to occur.

He's doing amazingly! Don't let every little snarl and growl get you down. Remember that there's a point at which it's just normal doggy behaviour, and from all you say you're fast approaching that point :)

[ladybug1802]

Just a suggestion but can you arrange to walk Dylan with your friend once a week or so as this way you can help her understand what he's thinking/doing in more situations?

I have suggested it and could do occasionally but its not that easy to arrange.....she just thinks he behaves differently with the other dogs around anyway, which is probably true, but I will try and do a walk again with her soon. I think it woul.d be good...plus I can see if he is different. I mean I know he probably wont listen as much!!

You are doing great, ladybug, and I'm sure this isn't setting him back. It just highlights how relaxed and confident he is around you. When you're not there, he feels like he still has to look after himself a bit, but when you're there he has total trust that nothing is going to go wrong. Which is really great!! Every little incident he has on the walk is obviously amplified because you're considering all the 'what if's, but you KNOW that he's coming on in leaps and bounds, and while you can't be with him every step of the way, your friend IS vigilant, and while not perfect, no terrible set backs are going to occur.

He's doing amazingly! Don't let every little snarl and growl get you down. Remember that there's a point at which it's just normal doggy behaviour, and from all you say you're fast approaching that point

Actually thats a good point....hadnt thought of it that way! That it could be because of all the training I have been doing with him that he feels nore confident with me even when he is on lead, but he maybe doiesnt with her and the other dogs she has with her who are off lead. Hmmm...good point!

[ladybug1802]

One my walk today I saw a couple with a little staffie cross, so I let Dylan say hello to her as we got nearer and I was chatting to thw owners, who were lovely. I explained he is a rescue, has bean fearful of strangers, and I just dont let him run over to dogs blah blah. So then Dylan toddled over to the three of us humans, and was all chilled, so I asked the people if they could give him a bit of sausage. I gave them some, they fed it to him and were stroking him...then a few mins later the man called Dylan over to him, Dylan went straight over and the man stroked him....and I was watching Dylan's face the entire time, and he didnt look anything other than nice and relaxed. I cannot tell you how proud I was!!

Then I saw a neighbour up at the National Trust place where I had parked....although I see her a lot, and actually was out with her last night, she hasnt seen Dylan for a few months. She saw us, gave him a treat and stroked him....and said she could not believe the difference! Its hard for me to remember exactly how he was a few months ago, but she reminded me he would just stare at her, and I woul;d tell her to stand still and not touch him! She also sent me a text later on saying she was so amazed at Dylan's progress and that he was like a different dog!

I am so incredibly pleased!!

[WufWuf]

Well done you! I'm so happy for you. Dylan is a very lucky boy to have found someone who believes in him.